I was recently sitting on the couch with my 4-year-old grandson, Noah. He was using my cell phone to play video games and wanted to download a new game. He kept trying without my assistance because at this age, they want to do everything by themselves. He finally asked for my help and as it turns out, he needed the password to my account. Once I entered my password, the game was finally able to download. He looked up at me with those big brown eyes and that smile of satisfaction and excitedly said to me, “Grammy, I’m so happy!” I then said to him, “Noah, what does that feel like?” His response blew me away. He said, “Like a donut!” At that moment, I felt as if I could literally feel his happiness. His word picture affected me mentally, physically and emotionally. It was a moment I will never forget.
As a Social & Emotional Intelligence Coach, I’m always acutely aware of how people in general convey their emotions during conversation. It’s been my experience that most dance around their feelings and often share what they think as opposed to what they feel. Many relationships go awry because of our inability to recognize, connect with and effectively share an emotion in the moment; thus my amazement at my grandson’s ability to demonstrate social & emotional intelligence at such a young age. It was a moment that deepened our relationship and made me fall deeper in love with him. I often wonder, what would the world be like if most adults could be that openly vulnerable and childlike in their communication with their spouses, friends and family? (Matthew 18:2, 3) What if the listener could create a place of safety for heartfelt dialogue and sheer vulnerability? (Proverbs 20:5) We no doubt, would move to a place in our relationships where we could not only hear the words coming from our partner’s mouth, but see, feel and be moved to respond appropriately once the words have landed in our heart. Yes…happiness for Noah is like a Donut. So, tell me what is happiness to you?